Supervised Parenting Time: The Ins and Outs
The name alone — “court-ordered supervised parenting time,” formerly know as “Supervised visitation” — sounds sterile and awkward. Being supervised as an adult is never comfortable. However, supervised parenting time should be viewed as an opportunity, not a penalty. By making the most of supervised visits, you can show the Court, your co-parent, and most importantly your child that you have only the best of intentions and are eager to do whatever it takes to have a positive relationship with your children.
If you’re reading this because you’ve been awarded supervised visits, it’s time to explore your options and try to make the best of the precious time you have with your children. If you are a custodial parent wondering how to prepare your child for a supervised visit, we have some beneficial information for you, as well. The wish is that this post will provide you the resources and tools you need to promote the most comfortable and enjoyable supervised visits for your child.
Court Orders – Why Me?
Supervised visitation is ordered by the Court under Arizona Statute, Title 25, Section 401 – 417, a state law that permits courts to make any order “for the custody, care, education, maintenance and support of the minor child as appears in his or her best interest.” Any order issued under this statute can be modified or terminated if doing so would be in the child’s best interest.
Factors the Court takes into account in determining whether supervised parenting time is in the best interest of the child and includes the physical and mental health of the parents, the level of conflict between the parents, a history of parental abuse or neglect by either parent, an act of domestic violence by either parent, or an act of abduction against any child.
Because it is state policy to ensure that children have frequent associations and a continuing relationship with both parents (see ARS Section 25-411, orders for supervised visitation are usually temporary: The Court may order supervised visits until it can hold a trial on custody and issue a permanent order, or it may order supervised visits after a trial, until the non-custodial parent can show that they have the skill to have more, unsupervised time with the child(ren).
Once more, the impermanent nature of the order should be regarded as favorable. The Court uses monitored visits to gauge how likely you are to positively coparent to meet your children’s needs, how likely you are to follow court orders, and how beneficial it is to the child to have a relationship with you. On the flip side, if you don’t take the order seriously or fail to exercise your visits, the Court can notice that, as well.
Where can visits take place and who can monitor?
Depending on the complexity of the case generally supervised parenting time can take place anywhere and with anyone to whom the parties agree. For example, if Mom is ordered to have supervised visits and Dad is comfortable with the children being in Mom’s parents’ care in a public setting, the parties can agree that visits will take place under the grandparents’ supervision at a park or arcade. Note that the order generally will be specific as to who may supervise the visits and where the visits may take place. For example, third party professional or aunt sally in a public arena.
An option for supervised parenting visitation is Tiny to Teen Services, located at 185 N. Apache Trail, Suite 10, Apache Junction, AZ 85120 and 112 N. Central Ave, Phoenix, AZ 85004. Tiny to Teen Services opened in 2019 and conducts supervised visits, exchanges, transport, and parental education. While the business’s rates are slightly higher– Tiny to Teen Services is unique from in that visits are one-on-one between each family and a supervisor and supervisors can go off-site (depending on whether the Court permits off-site visits and with some limitations, including whether the child has weather-appropriate clothing and whether monitoring agency provides transport.)
Parents at Tiny to Teen Services go through orientation before the first visit and all visits are within a supervisor’s line of sight and line of hearing. Because Tiny to Teen Services is privately run, the facility has more flexible hours and can accommodate one-on-one visits of nearly any length by prepaid appointment. Parents can have food delivered to the facility (which is stocked with games, toys, and crafts) or cook/heat up food in our kitchen Note that the supervising parent must pay the cost of admitting the supervisor to any off-site activities (for example, the supervisor’s ticket to museum, puppet show, etc.).
Monitor duties.
The largest misconception when it comes to family-supervised visits is that the chosen relative only needs to be in the same house or vicinity where the visit is taking place. This is not the case, as the supervisor should always be in the same room as the child.
General rules:
- Never leave the child and parent alone. Keep the supervised child(ren) in your line of sight and range of hearing at all times during the visit.
- Redirect inappropriate talk. Step in if the parent discusses inappropriate topics such as the court case or the other parent, or makes false promises such as, “Soon you will be allowed to live with me.”
- Keep concise records. Keep a log of visits you supervise and take notes summarizing each visit. Note any out-of-the ordinary events, such as if the parent makes in appropriate conversation or the child is injured during the visit.
As an unpaid supervisor, note-taking may seem unimportant or tedious, but detailed notes can assist the Court decide whether the non-custodial parent should have more time and/or unsupervised visits with the child.
In conclusion, there is a fine line between letting the parent be a parent and showing favoritism to the parent during a visit. Try not to interrupt a visit if it is going well, but remember to stop the parent from disparaging the custodial parent, even if you have similar negative feelings toward the custodial parent. Remember that you are the child’s protector. You have been tasked with guarding his or her best interest, not the visiting parent’s interest.
The dos and don’ts of supervised visits
The best way to ease tension and ensure that supervised parenting time goes well is to be prepared. Here are some tips from family law attorneys and facility supervisors:
Do’s
- Be positive and child focused.
- Build trust through consistency; attend your visits prepared.
- Inquire about children’s interests.
- Play with children.
Don’ts
- Speak negatively about other parent and their household.
- Do not bring gifts in excess, unless it is a celebration of holiday, birthday, graduations, etc..
- Don’t talk negatively about the court case.
- Do not have high expectations of children’s emotional or physical health, we all have bad days sometimes.